My Beloved Doll

My Beloved Doll

(La mia bambola amata)

Byakuran was happy. Very happy. Happy that he got what he wanted.

Sawada Tsunayoshi.

Yes, he wanted the Vongola Decimo. He wanted him to become his doll. His plaything. His toy. His property.

He wanted him because he wanted a plaything to break.

And he was the perfect candidate. After all, he was so innocent. So pure. Anyone can easily see his pureness in his eyes.

Just making Byakuran want him all the more.

So, of course, having him was a great accomplishment. After all, he is heavily guarded and loved. He was thankful he won Choice. If it wasn’t for that game, he would’ve never gotten him.

Broken so sweetly

(rotto così dolcemente)

Treated so bitterly

(trattati così amaramente)

He enjoyed it. He enjoyed breaking him by whispering sweet and gentle words which were laced with different emotions. After beating him or raping him, he would always whisper in his ears the same thing.

“Don’t worry Tsu-chan. You’re with me now. I promise to take care of you forever.”

The meaning was loud and clear; he was his and can never escape.

Lies down the hall

(si trova in fondo al corridoio)

Staring at me lifelessly

(mi fissa senza vita)

In the end, after breaking him, he would always leave him alone to have some time to pick himself up and get ready for the upcoming pain.

My Beloved Doll

(la mia bambola amata)

Tsuna hated it. He hated this place called “home.” It wasn’t home. It was simply a place where he now resided and was forever bound to.

A cage.

Why is it you forgive me

(perché è mi perdoni)

For breaking you so sweetly

(per rompere voi così dolcemente)

For treating you so bitterly

per il trattamento di voi in modo amaramente)

Every after beating, he would sit by himself down the hall, resting. He would rather stay there than his so-called “room.” And every after beating, there was just one thing that never ceased to amaze him.

He couldn’t find it in his heart not to forgive Baykuran.

He would always forgive him in his heart.

And yet, you love me

(eppure, mi ami)

He accepted everything. The beatings. The curses. The insults. The sexual abuse. The pain.

He doesn’t know how or why it happened. Now, all he could do was just accept it.

He fell in love with tormentor.

My beloved doll

(la mia bambola amata)

The chains.

The whips.

The drugs.

The tears.

He couldn’t forget it. Yes, he enjoyed using them on his doll, but that is no reason to actually have it engraved on his heart.

He couldn’t forget it because it was about his doll.

His doll. He enjoyed tormenting his doll. He enjoys breaking it sweetly and treating it bitterly. He enjoys seeing his sprawled out on the floor, staring at him lifelessly.

Yet, why does he feel so much pain seeing him cry?

Thank you for forgiving me

(vi ringrazio per avermi perdonato)

He knows.

He knows that his doll never hated him. He knows that his doll will willingly accept the pain and forgive him in the end.

That simple fact made him happy.

Happy that his doll does not hate him. Resent him. Loathe him.

Happy that he knows what that means.

Happy that his doll loves him back.

I will love you forever

(ti amerò per sempre)

Ever since finding out that his doll loved him, he went easier on him. He doesn’t want the new found love his doll had for him disappear so quickly.

He wants to show his doll that he loves him back.

So please

(quindi per favore)

Ever since Byakuran started going easy on him, he noticed a change in him.

Byakuran’s “sweet” words, that were once cold and laced with different emotions, were now warm and true.

Byakuran’s eyes, which would always look at him coldly, were now warm and loving.

After all these years, he was no longer naive.

Byakuran loved him.

And Tsunayoshi acknowledged that wholeheartedly.

Never leave my side for eternity

(non lasciare mai mio fianco per l’eternità)

One day, Byakuran decided to go to his doll. Not for a beating, but for something else.

When he found him in the hallway, he went closer to him and his eyes widened.

His doll’s hair was messy and dirty with his own blood. His clothes were ripped, showing multiple bruises, stab marks and injection marks. His skin was so pale, as if he was dead.


Was this his fault?

He went to his doll and hugged him.

“I’m sorry.” he whispered.

“I have always forgiven you, and I still do.” Tsuna replied.

Byakuran hugged him tighter and kissed him.

“Never leave me. Please.” he begged.

“I never will, Byakuran. After all, I am your doll. It is my job to be with you forever.” Tsuna said weakly.

“Heh. You’re right. So I’ll see you soon?” he said.


With that, Tsuna died in Byakuran’s arms.

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